Yes, everyone gets frustrated and irritated with co-workers from time to time. It is a natural response and you may even have a very good reason for it. But whether it is justifiable or not, an out of control reaction produces the same result—tension, reduced productivity, and likely more turnover.
The starting point for managing your emotional reactions effectively is to understand that the trigger for these emotional reactions is your beliefs. For example, if you believe that employees should do what they're told without question, you are likely to react negatively when they question what you want them to do. The cause of your reaction is your belief—not their behaviour!
Be honest with yourself. On a sheet of paper, complete these statements:
"I get angry when...
"I get irritated when...
"I find myself arguing with people when...
"I get impatient with people when...
The next step is to ask yourself, for each of these situations:
What were you thinking?
What are your underlying beliefs that led to you to thinking this way?
What alternative beliefs would be acceptable to you and would change your reaction?
In the example above, the old belief was: employees should do what they're told without question. An appropriate alternative belief could be: employees should ask questions to make sure they understand what to do, and why it needs to be done.
By following these steps, you will begin to recognise in advance what types of situations trigger emotional reactions that you need to reign in to create a high performance work environment. The next time you feel the need to yell or shout or laugh or cry, or run for the hills, you will have a plan in place for a more fitting way to handle your latest hurdle like a true leader.
